Ruby Red

Dearest B.,

I have started reading The Dark Red Amulet: The Oral Instructions on the Practice of Vajrakilaya. It’s the text that contains the practice of the hung of the powerful black phurba I have been doing over the past couple of weeks in trying to cut through the energetic ties that remain between MMRFRO and me. As well as present energetic connections with which I have to contend in regard to other individuals in situations that are causing me a great deal of suffering.

As I was reading through the text last night, I came to a rather startling realization about my motivation in doing this practice. In explaining the final mantra of the practice of the hung of the powerful black phurba (“The action of annihilating hostile demons is accomplished” p. 95), Khenchen Palden Sherabl Rinpoche and Khenpo Tsewang Dongyai Rinpoche state:

“You need to apply this subjugation to your own inner stateto your own egoclinging, ignorance, attachment, anger, and so forth. That is what you need to smash and transform. It is not necessary to look outside yourself for the demons; this is not something that you are doing to others. When you meditate on Vajrakilaya, if you think you have to cut down or smash someone else or something external, that is misguided and a wrong practice of the Vajrayana teachings. If you think you have to do that to others, perhaps you will soon become the demon, like Rudra, yourself.” P. 95

While reading those words last evening a moment of self-awareness and realization formed a crown of stinging nettles about my head. As the approach I have been taking with the practice of the hung of the powerful black phurba is just that, which is described in the second to last sentence in the previous paragraph. I have been approaching the practice with the thought and intent of needing the smash external forces and experiences (both past and present) to achieve liberation from the associated demons. It appears I have been seriously misguided in my approach.

That is to say, I need to modulate my approach in doing the black phurba practice as I have been doing it exactly in the manner the Rinpoches say not to do it. I have been doing the ritual with the intention of cutting the energetic ties between me and D. as well as the PITAs with whom I have to contend as part of my duties as the condo president of this insane community of which I’m a part. Also with the thought that cutting these ties would initiate a bit of needed karma smashing for the individuals in question.

So what does this mean?

As I’ve mentioned before in a letter to J., this means I have to work at the next level of creating an archetype based upon D. and the other PITAs. Since this practice is about smashing my karma (so to speak) as opposed to the karma of the others, I need to see each of the individuals as archetypes representing something more. Rather than seeing them as obstacles needing to be annihilated.

For D., it’s seeing him as an archetype representing the kinds of unacceptable behavior I’ve accepted with other guys in the past which I will no longer accept and tolerate. With the PITAs in the ‘hood, again it’s creating archetypes of unacceptable behavior that will not be tolerated and using the practice of the black phurba to get myself to a place to be able to be present and interact with these individuals without getting angry. But rather being able to see them with kindness and compassion when engaging with them.

For as the Rinpoches state:

“In order to receive the empowerment of Vajrakilaya, a practitioner first needs to have the right motivation, which is based upon bodhichitta. Bodhichitta is a Sanskrit word meaning ‘enlightened mind’ or ‘enlightened thought’ that encompasses the vast motivation of great compassion, love, and wisdom. Through bodhichitta, one’s mind becomes open toward every single sentient being.

Bodhichitta is very important in all its aspectsthese practices are essential for everyone who wishes to attain enlightenment. Relative bodhichitta and absolute bodhichitta are completely related to each other. One of them cannot be discarded while the other one is accepted because both are integral for attaining enlightenment.” (pp. 1-5)

If I am truly honest with myself, do I currently feel loving kindness toward D. and the PITAs? Not really. I continue to be very angry with D. and the fact I allowed him to “get away with” a great deal of unacceptable behavior when he was speaking with me. Currently, I am greatly lacking in compassion for the PITAs in the ‘hood as currently I perceive them as a bunch of whining cry-babies and trouble makers.

How’s that for compassion?

The image that is included with this letter is from a card my friend R. sent me. It’s a mandala of the Green Tara. Tara is the mother of liberation and represents the virtues of success in work and achievement through the practice of compassion. In the green form she is the Buddha of enlightened activity. In another form, the Blue Tara, she is the goddess of transmuting anger.

It would seem presently there is a need for me to cut through my various current attachments with the assistance of Vajrakilaya and connect with Tara in all her manifestations. I currently need to shatter the illusions and delusions hampering and holding me back on my path toward greater enlightenment.  As according to K on tribe dot net “the main purpose of Vajrakilaya is to destroy the inner three poisons of Ignorance, Grasping, and Anger. The secondary purpose of Vajrakilaya is to ward off psychic harm, remove karmic obstacles, and crush negative forces.”¹

I need to transmute the current anger and frustration I feel into loving kindness for all sentient beings. Even those who annoy me.

F*ck this spiritual enlightenment crap is a lot of work!

Sending you much love!

eg
theghotilover@gmail.com
www.theghotiletters.com
@EroGhoti