The ghoti of love?

Dearest J.,

When I initially sat down to begin to write a letter last evening, I hadn’t a clue about what I might wish to write. However, as it always does, the Universe provided me with a clue.

As I checked my stats last night, I discovered I got a hit to the biddy biddy blog with the keyword search “there are plenty of ghoti in the sea”. Which lead the reader to a letter I had written to B. back in March about my frustrations with hook ups/dating and my need to let go of those frustrations and see it as a fun game. Rather than allow myself to get all caught up in angst-ridden moments with it.

Along those lines, I’m reminded of an email exchange I had a couple of months ago as a result of a personal ad I put up on CL. I posted this ad in the Misc. Romance section. It was an ad written in an over the top manner mostly as a joke and I didn’t expect to receive any responses to it.

However, I did get one response from a gentleman saying, “Good grief!” I responded back with “Ummmm. I take it you are not my beloved. Thanks for the great feedback tho’. Positive strokes are always appreciated.” He responded with “Hmmm   something positive. Well, there is someone for everyone…even you…just keep looking…How’s that?” I responded with “Fabulous! I have little doubt there’s a special someone out there in the ethers for everyone. Even for li’l ol’ me.  However, I’m quite content should the desired collision not come to fruition. As there are a million ways for me to amuse myself before I cash in the chips (to use a rather trite and tired analogy). For me, it’s not so much a need to keep looking. But rather, keeping my eyes open for the right time and the right person.”

So between the keyword hit I received last evening and the email I received a couple of months ago. I suppose the Universe is trying to tell me that it’s time to venture into the dating waters once again and cast my net to see what ghoti I might catch.

I just hope the next ghoti I net ends up being StarKist rather than Chicken of the Sea.

There was a wild synchronicity associated with the “there are plenty of ghoti in the sea” keyword search hit last night.

Once again, I have been bitten by the bug to create some kind of web 2.0 website to make money. While there are no overt signs of it yet, I have a sinking feeling the days are numbered for my position at the day gig. That once again, leads to me to consider the direction my quote/unquote career is heading and what I need to do in that regard.

Last night after I got done meditating and while I was making dinner, I got to thinking about social networking websites and any voids that currently may exist there where one might create a site to fill them. For whatever reason, I started to consider the several different kinds of dating sites that exist presently. I did a quick Google search and found a couple of Wiki Pages about social networking sites. One of which listed several for dating.  The one that caught my eye as I was reading the article, and I’m not sh*ting you here… PlentyofFish.com. And what’s even funnier, again I’m not pulling your leg, I was literally on the PlentyofFish.com website at the same time the hit came into the blog via the aforementioned keyword search.

Is that too freeky or what? If I didn’t know better, I’d swear there are spooks sniffing my internet traffic. Okay, this gets evermore woo-woo. I went to UrbanDictionary.com a second ago to get the link to the word spook in the first sentence of this paragraph and what was the most prominent advert on the definition page? But an advert for PlentyofFish.com. Weirdness! It’s as if I’ve gotten trapped in the super-conscious and I can’t get outkind of like the spirit of Elvis at the drive thru at Burger King in Memphis.

So where does this leave me in regard to the question of dating? I dunno.

While this is going to sound rather odd as to it possibly affecting my attitudes about dating, however, what happened at UVA recently has really disturbed me. It once again affirms for me that one can never really know an individual for whom they feel an attraction. I’m sure Yeardly Love never in a million years expected or thought that George Huguely would kill her when she first met him and began to date him. He may have made such threats via email as the relationship descended into a break up and they will be discovered as part of the investigation of the crime. Weird thing is tho’,  Mr. Huguely looks a lot like MMRFRO. I swear he could have easily looked similar at Mr. Huguely’s current age.

While he never showed signs of a propensity for violence, D. certainly showed indications of being potentially abusive—in a passive-aggressive manner of course.

It’s interesting in my daily Tarot reading yesterday I pulled both the 5 of Rods and the 5 of Pentacles. The 5 of Rods is about the implication of being at odds with oneself and current wants not matching true needs; the need to stop the internal battle and set priorities to achieve authentic needs. The 5 of Pentacles is about the inability to see the way forward due to concentrating on perceived lack or deprivation and being held back due to fear. All of which apply presently. I need to let go of the irrational fear I have around dating due to my experiences over the past few years particularly the abortion that was the “relationship” between D. and me.

Because, after all, as the keyword combination states:  “there are plenty of ghoti in the sea”

Sending you much love!